_______________Only those who never gives up gets to see a miracle______

Thursday, May 28, 2009
5/28/2009 11:47:00 PM

Dear Diary,

I cant believe this... 1st day was... super super duper sweeettttt... i felt so loved... then on the 3rd day... it all fell crashing to the ground... i screwed up.. why the fuck did i go itchy mouth ask him that stupid question?? Start to kanna backstab liao.. so now it's good luck to me.. i tink more likely is byebye already.

i dont fucking believe it.. everything that i had worked hard for in the last 1yr is gonna come crashing down all the way...

I'll fight yea I'll fight.. but i dunno.. Our relationship is only that 3 days old... And she is the kind who will slowly fall in love.. so 3 days is just not enough for her to commit.. For me, before the start, i already committed 100%.

I finally know what is called true love.. what is called to love a person..
Love can really make a person do alot of stunts... things that he wont normally do..

Will it be byebye for me? Will I lose this battle?
I am so broke now that i cannot afford to bring her out to eat etc...
Paying for all the debts have left me stranded..
I dont even have enough money for myself already...

I wanted to listen to her voice on tuesday.. Bcos i couldn't take the stress anymore.. But she dozed off.. I dont blame her.. she's really very tired after working.. Embarrassingly, I burst into tears on my bed suddenly. Till now i never told anyone about it.. super embarrassing...

Right now i really feel like crying again... Something i worked towards for the past 1yr... finally achieved... now it's just slowly slipping away from your fingers..
Fuck it... Already cried 2 times in the past 3mths... Y am i such a crybaby.. and i swore to myself after my grandfather's death that I'll never cry so easily ever again..

If i win this battle, i do not gain much.. only to face even more challenges further on..
If i lose this battle, i will lose 2 of my closest frens.. Never to contact each other again..

Typing this entry brings tears to my eyes. No i wont cry. I'm just sad at the state of things. Why cant people love freely?
Just bcos you like her, u kill off everyone who gets close to her, but you dont even have the balls to admit u like her. Fuck you.

waiting for you

ME

Name: Junwen
Bday: 25th Oct 1985
Age: 22
Horoscope: Scorpio
Sex: Male (Duh ._.)
Job: Network Engineer
Fav color: Blue!
FAv mUsIc: anything that's nice (prefer soothing music)
FAv FoOd: Peking Duck, Chilli, Lettuce w/ mayonnise, Brocolli, Root Beer, Kikapo Joy Juice, Mango Juice, Orange Juice
Bad Pts: Nerd, Stupid, small brain, Short, dumb, idiot, unsensitive, useless, wooden block, pessimistic, big mouth (more to come)
Gd Pts: For people to find out! But i tink dun have any la.
Characteristics: Talkative, ~~always smiling~~, dunno directions, pro in sleeping at anywhere, blur